On My Way To The End

There are many different stages that life that you are forced to walk through whether or not you want to. I am well on my way into that stage most would call adulthood but I will be 100 % honest I don't like it here even though I need to be here for a while, you know until I am old enough to retire and I can live in the golden years that everyone swears are out there somewhere.

School is drawing closer and closer to a close and I am scared, excited, scared, terrified, nervous, scared, and ummm oh yeah scared. I will now admit that I have used remaining in school as a shield and I have enjoyed hiding behind the excuse that I can't find work because I am still in school or because I am not mature enough but at least one of these justifications is very very close to coming to a close. I know that this is one of those defining moments for me and I am excited but still now what is keeps ringing in my head.

Now what I have done what I set out to do, education wise.

Now what I am lacking that illusive relationship that everyone demands I have.

Now what I am smart yet unemployable.

Now what there are so many things it appears that I will never do.

And then to top off all of the scary things that I am facing I am still living with my mom which I should get some kind of award for and my brother moves home in 3 weeks and I know that will get ugly fast. So I am on my way to the end of yet another section of my life and I am ready, maybe.