Monday, June 27, 2005

The end of an era

A huge part of my 23 years on this earth has come to an end and not even in the manner that I thought it would. Our yearly family vacation to Silver Lake Michigan will no longer be a family vacation of sorts. My grandparents will not be joining us this year it is certain now. My cousin Staci isn't going. I am not going and if I do it will only be for a few days so now the great debate begins...Do they stay or do they go. I think we will go for a bit but I don't know for how many days.

After 23 years of drama, laughter, tubing, and duneing it is over, or at least it appears that way. I know that there will be time for fun and laughter later in life but it is hard to think that a 23 year tradition in my life has officially come to a close. We all knew this day was coming my grandparents have been taking trips up there since my dad was a small child but now it is over the year after year streak has come to an end.

In other news packing is finally starting to take shape and the idea that I will finally be out on my own and struggling makes me strangely happy. I know that there are times when I will want to come back to the 'safety' of home but home is anything but safe for me. I am overjoyed, scared to death, uncertain, ecstatic, and so many other things inside there is no complete way to describe it right now.

Today I sat down and worked through my budget and noticed very quickly that I can't afford to live away from here but I am going to make a go of it anyway. I am sure that God will provide and that it will be okay sooner or later. I am excited. Change is coming...How everyone takes it is their own business..

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hadn't heard that about the trip, although I'm not surprised. It's weird...maybe you can relate...but it's kind of sad it's ending, even though the last few years have been more frustrating than good. I think i'll mostly miss a week to actually hang out with you, since that's one of the few times we get to. Life happens. I think I'd like to take my kids there someday (just maybe without their grandparents on their mother's side ;-) -staci