This last month has been rough for me at best. I am starting to realize that I may never get to leave Ameri-Camp which isn't all bad but it doesn't get me any closer to the job that I really want either. The idea of not being able to do what I studied so hard to do is very frustrating as one could tell. I just want to do the things that I really want to do. I studied and studied and now I have little to nothing to show for it. I mean I have a wonderful piece of paper but it doesn't get me any further in life it feels like.
Life has been good over all I am just frustrated I guess but life will go on and it will all work out of the better. Since I got my health insurance I have been making sure to get the most for the premiums that I pay each week. I mean I have been to more doctors since the insurance kicked in than I had been in months possibly even years since I am again walking in the world of the insured. I do feel better knowing that I am getting some of those little things that need to be taken care of done since you never know when you could be facing another challenge or another job change but worse things have happened you know.
My family is doing Easter and that should be pretty fun and relaxing. I have plans to go to church and spend time with a few old friends during the Easter holiday while trying to focus on the real meaning of the day, the day that Christ rose from the dead and forever changed the destiny of the world today. If HE hadn't died and rose we would be forever condemned to hell for the sins that have been committed. It is really amazing when you think about it. The very idea that HE saved us is wonderful.
Everyone have a wonderful Easter.
Friday, April 06, 2007
Monday, March 26, 2007
90
Some see that number and thing of degrees or of time or of any number of things. My great-grandmother turned 90 yesterday begining a whole new decade in her life. I only hope to live that you in reality. I mean think about it if I am now only in my twenties then what would my ninties be like. We had a small party for her and it was nice to see all of those family members that I don't get to see very often at all but still it was craziness.
Thursday, March 01, 2007
Time
Time seems to get away from us all. Here it is the first day of March and I still haven't found that job that I have always wanted. I am 25 now and have a Masters degree and it is wonderful but yet that degree that was to help me open up doors has gotten me no where in the work place. In the last 6 months it has been difficult to deal with all of the changes for me.
1. I left the job of 8 years that I had become uncomfortable comfortable in and that was a a dangerous place to be. I still think about the day that I drew my line and said no more and wonder from time to time if it was the right thing to do but it is now done and it is something that I will have to live with when it comes to employment history for the next five years. I mean I left on good terms and even worked out my entire two weeks notice even though there were times when I would have rather just walked out and burned that bridge but I know that there is always a possibility that I may one day have to go back there so I kept the option open even though I pray every day that going back isn't one of the things that I will have to do.
2. I moved in with my grandparents which has been nice and has worked out better for me health wise but still it is a change for me and for them since they had grown accustom to life on their own without kids in their home.
3. I started a new job that has been good but not quite what I want but it will work for now and it seems that they like me here too for the most part.
So for now I have to go back to work but where did all the time go....I don't know but I will let you know when I do.
1. I left the job of 8 years that I had become uncomfortable comfortable in and that was a a dangerous place to be. I still think about the day that I drew my line and said no more and wonder from time to time if it was the right thing to do but it is now done and it is something that I will have to live with when it comes to employment history for the next five years. I mean I left on good terms and even worked out my entire two weeks notice even though there were times when I would have rather just walked out and burned that bridge but I know that there is always a possibility that I may one day have to go back there so I kept the option open even though I pray every day that going back isn't one of the things that I will have to do.
2. I moved in with my grandparents which has been nice and has worked out better for me health wise but still it is a change for me and for them since they had grown accustom to life on their own without kids in their home.
3. I started a new job that has been good but not quite what I want but it will work for now and it seems that they like me here too for the most part.
So for now I have to go back to work but where did all the time go....I don't know but I will let you know when I do.
Friday, February 09, 2007
Fewer And Fewer
Fewer and fewer are my posts here....long since past is the idea that keep the world if anyone out there does read this informed about my life is fun and exciting. This would also mean that I have new information to share with everyone.
So here are some of the highlights of the last three weeks.
I am still at Ameri-Camp. I have had a couple of interviews in Fort Wayne and I am hoping that they will pan out. My job here is growing on me but the drive and need to feel like I am doing more in my field is important to me and I am not sure that I can get all of those things here. I am about to qualify for health insurance which I can hardly wait for but I knew it would be a while before I could get any real coverage and now that it is finally approaching it is a huge relief.
Several disputes with friends over the last few weeks have caused me great stress. It is hard for me to develop relationships as it is and for some reason with out a bit of help it is easy for me to ruin them without the idea of thinking twice on the issue. Friends that I have known for only a short time have had to take a lot of crap from me and seem to be dealing with it a whole lot better than I ever would. I know that I am a pain in the butt about 90% of the time and that there are those who feel and would tell you that it should be nearly 190% of the time.
Tonight I am going to stay with some friends who moved away a few months ago and it has made me sad to know that they are so far away. The drive from work is only about an hour but from home it is nearly two. The have a one-year-old and another one on the way here very soon. It will be another boy and it will be nice although I will stick my need to stay away from babies and not handle him, which Heather seems to be dealing with okay for now, we will see how she does once he is born and I still won't handle him. Deven was nearly 6 months old before they could convince me to hold him for just a minute while sitting down. I know there are women out there who love babies and want to have hundreds of them and I am here to tell you that I am not one of those women.
Family is the same...driving me crazy and not getting any better.
I would be amiss to not say something about Anna Nicole Smith and her death yesterday. I am sorry that she died without ever getting whatever it is she was looking for. I know she was famous and she lived in Bahama, which would be enough for me but there was clearly something more that she was looking for and I don't think that she ever found it.
So for now I am off but once again I will attempt to make more entries here.
So here are some of the highlights of the last three weeks.
I am still at Ameri-Camp. I have had a couple of interviews in Fort Wayne and I am hoping that they will pan out. My job here is growing on me but the drive and need to feel like I am doing more in my field is important to me and I am not sure that I can get all of those things here. I am about to qualify for health insurance which I can hardly wait for but I knew it would be a while before I could get any real coverage and now that it is finally approaching it is a huge relief.
Several disputes with friends over the last few weeks have caused me great stress. It is hard for me to develop relationships as it is and for some reason with out a bit of help it is easy for me to ruin them without the idea of thinking twice on the issue. Friends that I have known for only a short time have had to take a lot of crap from me and seem to be dealing with it a whole lot better than I ever would. I know that I am a pain in the butt about 90% of the time and that there are those who feel and would tell you that it should be nearly 190% of the time.
Tonight I am going to stay with some friends who moved away a few months ago and it has made me sad to know that they are so far away. The drive from work is only about an hour but from home it is nearly two. The have a one-year-old and another one on the way here very soon. It will be another boy and it will be nice although I will stick my need to stay away from babies and not handle him, which Heather seems to be dealing with okay for now, we will see how she does once he is born and I still won't handle him. Deven was nearly 6 months old before they could convince me to hold him for just a minute while sitting down. I know there are women out there who love babies and want to have hundreds of them and I am here to tell you that I am not one of those women.
Family is the same...driving me crazy and not getting any better.
I would be amiss to not say something about Anna Nicole Smith and her death yesterday. I am sorry that she died without ever getting whatever it is she was looking for. I know she was famous and she lived in Bahama, which would be enough for me but there was clearly something more that she was looking for and I don't think that she ever found it.
So for now I am off but once again I will attempt to make more entries here.
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
Nearly a month has passed since I last wrote here. I used to write here so my friends and family would know what was going on but I do know that they like me are busy and don't have time to read about my life so I have started to let it slide. There has been a lot going since my last post in mid-December. Where to start seems to be a bit more difficult than what all has gone on so I will start writing and work my way from there.
December was a month of change. I became full time at Ameri-Camp which is nice because I will sooner or later get some health insurance and benefits package. I will have paid vacations and time off when I am sick which I never ever had before if I was sick then I didn't get paid and that was rough on me too.
Christmas came and went and was fairly uneventful. There are times that it is hard to deal with family on certain issues (relationships) so I kept my mouth shut most of the time. Staci knew that there was stuff going on but I have choose to keep them out of the loop as far as goings on in my personal life. The nagging about getting a good job seems to be slowly getting to be less and less obnoxious. I am sure when I tell them that after I get my insurance it is my plan to leave in a few months and move to Fort Wayne and live with my boyfriend that there will be hell to pay.
New years was spent at a friends house and ended in disaster. I have now lost friends over a series of events that took place there and it has been a rough start to 2007 but it will be a good year if it is nothing else the issues were brought out and dealt with immediately and this is a different outlook for me. I am not going to as worried about what all everyone is thinking about me and I am going to do what makes me happy and makes me feel like I am reaching the goals that I have in my own life.
The start of this year has seen several changes for me including a complete revamping of my fiances which will include a savings account and paying all my bills on time which to some is no big deal but to me it is because I had allowed myself to slack on some of the things that needed to be done. I am also living with my grandma full time which is nice because I don't have to deal with all of the crap of living with my mom.
That is all I have for now. I will write soon.
December was a month of change. I became full time at Ameri-Camp which is nice because I will sooner or later get some health insurance and benefits package. I will have paid vacations and time off when I am sick which I never ever had before if I was sick then I didn't get paid and that was rough on me too.
Christmas came and went and was fairly uneventful. There are times that it is hard to deal with family on certain issues (relationships) so I kept my mouth shut most of the time. Staci knew that there was stuff going on but I have choose to keep them out of the loop as far as goings on in my personal life. The nagging about getting a good job seems to be slowly getting to be less and less obnoxious. I am sure when I tell them that after I get my insurance it is my plan to leave in a few months and move to Fort Wayne and live with my boyfriend that there will be hell to pay.
New years was spent at a friends house and ended in disaster. I have now lost friends over a series of events that took place there and it has been a rough start to 2007 but it will be a good year if it is nothing else the issues were brought out and dealt with immediately and this is a different outlook for me. I am not going to as worried about what all everyone is thinking about me and I am going to do what makes me happy and makes me feel like I am reaching the goals that I have in my own life.
The start of this year has seen several changes for me including a complete revamping of my fiances which will include a savings account and paying all my bills on time which to some is no big deal but to me it is because I had allowed myself to slack on some of the things that needed to be done. I am also living with my grandma full time which is nice because I don't have to deal with all of the crap of living with my mom.
That is all I have for now. I will write soon.
Thursday, December 21, 2006
Merry Chistmas
I may get to post tomorrow but I am not sure therefore I want to take this time to with anyone who still reads this a Merry Christmas.
Christmas time comes with a lot of drama that isn't necessary. Christmas is about Christs birth and nothing more. Of course it is nice to take the time to see family and connect with friends but at the same time there is so much about the holidays that is over rated. I can tell you that I did not purchase a single gift for anyone and in some ways makes me feel better because then I don't have to worry about being fair or if I forgot someone. I got no one anything.
I didn't get gifts because right now there is a point where I must pay my bills first and worry about gifts second. I am doing great though really. It isn't bad and I am starting to slowly but surely enjoy parts of my job. I would rather be in Fort Wayne but since this doesn't appear to be happening for me right at this moment I will be fine and I will get there sooner or later. The hardest part of this job is not being able to see Rob as much as I would like but that is another issue that will slowly buy surly resolve itself.
Anyway....MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE...THE NEW YEAR IS AROUND THE CORNER
Christmas time comes with a lot of drama that isn't necessary. Christmas is about Christs birth and nothing more. Of course it is nice to take the time to see family and connect with friends but at the same time there is so much about the holidays that is over rated. I can tell you that I did not purchase a single gift for anyone and in some ways makes me feel better because then I don't have to worry about being fair or if I forgot someone. I got no one anything.
I didn't get gifts because right now there is a point where I must pay my bills first and worry about gifts second. I am doing great though really. It isn't bad and I am starting to slowly but surely enjoy parts of my job. I would rather be in Fort Wayne but since this doesn't appear to be happening for me right at this moment I will be fine and I will get there sooner or later. The hardest part of this job is not being able to see Rob as much as I would like but that is another issue that will slowly buy surly resolve itself.
Anyway....MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE...THE NEW YEAR IS AROUND THE CORNER
Thursday, December 07, 2006
The Time Has Come
The time has come to acknowledge the fact that I didn't know nearly as much as I would like to think that I did...You know the moment when you realize that your nearly $50,000 in student loans seem to be in vain and you don't have a good job...I have a great boyfriend but a great job I don't have...
So anyway I've been working on not being to judgemental or quick to push people away and this has proven much more difficult than I thought it would be. I will write more later.
So anyway I've been working on not being to judgemental or quick to push people away and this has proven much more difficult than I thought it would be. I will write more later.
Monday, November 27, 2006
Another Holiday Past
Another Thanksgiving has come and gone and here I sit just now taking time to reflect. Why is it that we take the time that we should be sitting back thinking about everything that we have going for us and instead we have the stress of making sure that everyone is happy healthy and set for the influx of time that is spent with the family.
Let me give you a run down of the last 5 days. Thursday we had a simple diner with my mom, brother and grandparents. Friday diner with my dads parents, entertaining you betcha. You never know the topic but you can be sure of one thing grandma isn't going to like something or she is going to be so happy with your choice that its unreasonable. If I had said I left my boyfriend and i was going to be singe forever she would be so happy for me and be oh so supportive. Since the news is that I am thinking about getting married then it is awful and unreasonable for me to do such a thing. Friday night I went and hung out with some friends and talked and laughed a lot. It was nice to be out of the house for a while at least. Saturday was a soup diner with my moms entire family which was good since no one killed each other we deem it a success. I also helped some friends move on Saturday and made one long drive to Angola to see their new house and get all of their stuff out of their old house. Sunday I had my cousin with me all day and it was nice to get to see her and spend some time with her, which I don't get to do very often so we had some fun.
There is more but not right now I will be in touch...everyone keep in touch please I feel alone out here.
Let me give you a run down of the last 5 days. Thursday we had a simple diner with my mom, brother and grandparents. Friday diner with my dads parents, entertaining you betcha. You never know the topic but you can be sure of one thing grandma isn't going to like something or she is going to be so happy with your choice that its unreasonable. If I had said I left my boyfriend and i was going to be singe forever she would be so happy for me and be oh so supportive. Since the news is that I am thinking about getting married then it is awful and unreasonable for me to do such a thing. Friday night I went and hung out with some friends and talked and laughed a lot. It was nice to be out of the house for a while at least. Saturday was a soup diner with my moms entire family which was good since no one killed each other we deem it a success. I also helped some friends move on Saturday and made one long drive to Angola to see their new house and get all of their stuff out of their old house. Sunday I had my cousin with me all day and it was nice to get to see her and spend some time with her, which I don't get to do very often so we had some fun.
There is more but not right now I will be in touch...everyone keep in touch please I feel alone out here.
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
One weird Place to Live
Indiana is one weird place to live especially when it comes to weather patterns...this morning it was cold. Frost covered all of the windows on my sad little truck sitting all alone on the driveway. So I got the dog dressed (pink collar and a leash) and we walked out to start the truck to try to take the chill out of the air but this did me no good. I mean the air was warmer once I got in and the frost was starting to melt but it was still cold to say the least.
Today we freeze and in two days for Thanksgiving it will nearly 60 degrees. This place is funny and temperamental.
Today we freeze and in two days for Thanksgiving it will nearly 60 degrees. This place is funny and temperamental.
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
One Long Night
Last night was rough at best and there was very little sleep to go around. Around 10 pm my aunts best friend called and needed a place to stay but that was just the beginning. It is a domestic dispute that has overtaken her entire life all the way down the smallest things that she has to deal with. Her husband drinks...a lot...not like me you know 1 smernoff a month or so...and he doesn't pay the bills with his check he just pays part, yes part not all, of the house payment and leaves the rest of the bills up to her to take care. She runs her own business and does a decent job of it but struggles when it comes to money management so we as a family are slowly but surely working with her on these issues. Anyway back to why she ended up in our basement...she and her husband got in a big fight and without thinking she stormed out and into the woods with no car keys, no coat, and no cell phone, not that the phone would have mattered they have been shut off because of failure to pay the bill. So after leaving, which was the best thing for her to do she then needed a place to go and she lives next door to her in-laws who she was pretty sure wouldn't be happy to know that she had left in such anger but wait it gets better...they had heard the fight and called the cops about what was going on thinking that she had started, by asking for a little bit of help in their marriage but in reality it was her husband who was being the world biggest jerk.
So here we are at home watching the end of Law and Order because that's what I do and boom three extra people move into the basement of our house, yes that is three...The mom, the 10 year old, and my favorite the 3 year old. I should warn you that I don't do real well around little kids because they freak me out more than anything. I have gotten better since I have spent time with my friend Heather and her 1 year old but they still freak me out and if Deven starts to cry I just want to give him back so that I don't break him. The concept is the same when it comes to these two little kids...the oldest isn't too bad because she listens pretty well but the 3 year old is so overwhelming for me and to make it worse I don't how long they are staying so I am going to have to deal with it.
Okay enough of that...Life is okay I still haven't gotten moved to Fort Wayne but it is starting to good for the first of the year. I know where in town I want to live and even if I have to commute to Syracuse for a few weeks from there life will go on and I will find a job there, I am after all smart and wonderful if I may say so myself.
I have one more tangent then I will log off but its a doosy if you're not in the mood this is your warning..........
Why is that if men have a weight problem then it is okay and they can get jobs but because I have one and I am working on it I can't seem to find work and I know that part of it is that I am overweight, no one seems to care that I am loosing weight or that I have busted my butt literally and figuratively to get where I am and I will continue to do so until a point in time where I think I am being treated fairly by those around me. I just so pissed off over the whole thing. I went to college and studied my self nearly to death but no one seems to even care because I have extra poundage around my hips and tummy then I must not be qualified to the job you know after all I'm fat.
Okay I'm done for now.
So here we are at home watching the end of Law and Order because that's what I do and boom three extra people move into the basement of our house, yes that is three...The mom, the 10 year old, and my favorite the 3 year old. I should warn you that I don't do real well around little kids because they freak me out more than anything. I have gotten better since I have spent time with my friend Heather and her 1 year old but they still freak me out and if Deven starts to cry I just want to give him back so that I don't break him. The concept is the same when it comes to these two little kids...the oldest isn't too bad because she listens pretty well but the 3 year old is so overwhelming for me and to make it worse I don't how long they are staying so I am going to have to deal with it.
Okay enough of that...Life is okay I still haven't gotten moved to Fort Wayne but it is starting to good for the first of the year. I know where in town I want to live and even if I have to commute to Syracuse for a few weeks from there life will go on and I will find a job there, I am after all smart and wonderful if I may say so myself.
I have one more tangent then I will log off but its a doosy if you're not in the mood this is your warning..........
Why is that if men have a weight problem then it is okay and they can get jobs but because I have one and I am working on it I can't seem to find work and I know that part of it is that I am overweight, no one seems to care that I am loosing weight or that I have busted my butt literally and figuratively to get where I am and I will continue to do so until a point in time where I think I am being treated fairly by those around me. I just so pissed off over the whole thing. I went to college and studied my self nearly to death but no one seems to even care because I have extra poundage around my hips and tummy then I must not be qualified to the job you know after all I'm fat.
Okay I'm done for now.
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
THIS JUST IN
I have no life, okay so that's not news but it seemed important to me. My friends Mike and Heather just moved away and once angain I find myself stuck here in a town that I can't stand alone with no close friends and no one to really interact with other than my fearless dog, who really isnt' fearless at all and she is a big chicken...sure she will bark at strangers but only after hiding behind you to do so...
I am looking at places in Fort Wayne again. I've decided that I am just going to go for it.
I am looking at places in Fort Wayne again. I've decided that I am just going to go for it.
Thursday, November 02, 2006
Okay a Bit more Time
Drama, Drama, Drama.
Have I mentioned before that there are times that my family drives me completely nuts, which isn't hard to do because I am nearly there all by myself. I know that seems a bit old news but it is true. The topic of choice is money. The bottom line I really don't have any, which they point out like it is news to me and I am instantly going to be able to make money without any work or time spent redoing my financially status. It is strange that I know that I will be okay and I am at peace about it yet everyone else feels the need to be overly involved in the happenings or for that matter the non-happenings of my current finances. It does seem to me that I am sure there are those out there that are much worse off financially than I am but still what are we going to do.
Not being in school has been wonderful yet a bit unnerving as well. I miss the studying and the time with friends that I once had. I knew what it was like to hang out and laugh with people who were my own age, heck that were the age of my boyfriend but now I spend hours alone and go to bed early because I can't seem to get adjusted to this schedule that I wanted so badly. I do love the schedule but since he works seconds then that means there is very little time for the two of us. I haven't seen him in three weeks and it is about to kill me emotional. I want to be with him I want to be married I need these things we have been working so hard to have these things and I wish that I could make them a part of my everyday life. Now I don't live in a world were marriage will make everything better or that we will live happily ever after for ever and ever but we can communicate, most days, and we are good at expression, he is the first thing that I think about when I wake up and the last thing that I think about when I go to sleep.
I still love my truck and it is nice to have something that is mine and really mine and no one is going to take it away from me for no reason, at least not yet I wouldn't put it past my mother to give it here best shot to be real honest.
I miss everyone hopefully soon I will get to start spending time with my friends again. You can call me though...Just so you know.
Have I mentioned before that there are times that my family drives me completely nuts, which isn't hard to do because I am nearly there all by myself. I know that seems a bit old news but it is true. The topic of choice is money. The bottom line I really don't have any, which they point out like it is news to me and I am instantly going to be able to make money without any work or time spent redoing my financially status. It is strange that I know that I will be okay and I am at peace about it yet everyone else feels the need to be overly involved in the happenings or for that matter the non-happenings of my current finances. It does seem to me that I am sure there are those out there that are much worse off financially than I am but still what are we going to do.
Not being in school has been wonderful yet a bit unnerving as well. I miss the studying and the time with friends that I once had. I knew what it was like to hang out and laugh with people who were my own age, heck that were the age of my boyfriend but now I spend hours alone and go to bed early because I can't seem to get adjusted to this schedule that I wanted so badly. I do love the schedule but since he works seconds then that means there is very little time for the two of us. I haven't seen him in three weeks and it is about to kill me emotional. I want to be with him I want to be married I need these things we have been working so hard to have these things and I wish that I could make them a part of my everyday life. Now I don't live in a world were marriage will make everything better or that we will live happily ever after for ever and ever but we can communicate, most days, and we are good at expression, he is the first thing that I think about when I wake up and the last thing that I think about when I go to sleep.
I still love my truck and it is nice to have something that is mine and really mine and no one is going to take it away from me for no reason, at least not yet I wouldn't put it past my mother to give it here best shot to be real honest.
I miss everyone hopefully soon I will get to start spending time with my friends again. You can call me though...Just so you know.
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
An Update
There are those who still read this, I think. I try to use to to communicate the big things but it seems to fall by the way side as my life takes many uneventful turns. Rob and I are still together and the talk of getting married has become a forfront conversation and the idea is exciting yet very scary. Three kids in one big dive, wow!!! What on earth would I do with that. I know that I will be a good step-mom but I know that there is a need in their life and I could fill some of it.
My new job bores me to pieces, nothing better than simply being an entry level receptionist with a MBA for christ sake. I know that it seems to be a bit odd that I would have such hard core feelings about this after all of the complaining that I did about not haveing a job at all. I am happy to be working but I would be happier to be working in a city that I want to live and in an organization that I feel I am truely being utilized in.
I will post more tomorrow and try to keep it updated.
My new job bores me to pieces, nothing better than simply being an entry level receptionist with a MBA for christ sake. I know that it seems to be a bit odd that I would have such hard core feelings about this after all of the complaining that I did about not haveing a job at all. I am happy to be working but I would be happier to be working in a city that I want to live and in an organization that I feel I am truely being utilized in.
I will post more tomorrow and try to keep it updated.
Saturday, September 30, 2006
A New Job
So I have a job now. I guess I should be happy and about to jump out of my skin yet I am not. I am glad that I will get a pay check at the end of each week which will be nice since I haven't had one in nearly eight weeks now but at the same time I don't really want the job that I am being offered. I really want to live in Fort Wayne and that is where my love is and that is where my heart is going to be for a long time. We are looking at wedding dates yes you read that right but we can't really choose one until I am living closer to town and have a job that will allow more complete communication between the two of us. I know that it is going to be hard over the next few weeks yet I also know that there is no way to make this work long term. We have spent two years in two different cities that are not far away yet seem to be a world away when it comes to really getting to spend time with one another.
I have also thought about the idea of just calling it off and letting bygones be bygones because I don't know for sure where I am headed and I sure the heck don't know where he is headed yet after two years that doesn't seem to be fair either. I am torn in two at the moment because of these choices and have no idea what on earth to do about the idea of moving away or even finding a job. There are so many ways to go with all of this information.
So hi ho hi ho its off to work I go so here goes nothing at least for now.
I have also thought about the idea of just calling it off and letting bygones be bygones because I don't know for sure where I am headed and I sure the heck don't know where he is headed yet after two years that doesn't seem to be fair either. I am torn in two at the moment because of these choices and have no idea what on earth to do about the idea of moving away or even finding a job. There are so many ways to go with all of this information.
So hi ho hi ho its off to work I go so here goes nothing at least for now.
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
Wow What A Long Six Weeks
The last six weeks have been interesting at best. Unemployment has not been good to me at all. I don't like not haveing to get up and go somewhere every morning, I don't like not haveing a place of my own, and possibly most of all I don't like the fact that there is no pay check to be had. I am looking don't get me wrong I have averaged about six interviews a week but I have not landed the job yet. I have yet another one tomorrow and hopefully something comes of it.
I have done the staffing adgency thing and I have done the stalk a job tackic and still I am empty handed. This is the point where many would expect me to say that I am sorry that I left Marsh but I am not. I know that there are jobs out there and I know that there is a way to get a job and I just haven't found that one that I am supposed to have.
Now on from the job front, last weekend was my grandmas side of the family reunion and it was a zoo at best. Those people drive me nuts and they all think that the things that I do are so awful that there is no way that I am ever going to be anything. Acutally what they are saying is that I won't be like them and they seem to think that is a bad thing. I know that I never want to be like them at all the only real thing that they have going for them is money and although money is nice there are so many more important things that must be delt with, maybe that is why not having a job isn't driving me crazy but it is starting to get to me. I just want to be able to pay my bills and make ends meet.
In other news at the reunion I got to hang out with my cousin because we ran away from all of the freaks that drive us crazy and talk and laugh a lot. It would be a safe bet that the people that she goes to school with think I am a nut job and wonder what kind of family she has but it was nice.
I still live my mom's mom because it aids in me keeping my sanity if I were to move back into my mom's house I am pretty sure that I would come 100% unglued because of the craziness that mom insists on putting herself in.
Well everyone if you still read this let me know what is up in your life and I will talk to you all soon.
I have done the staffing adgency thing and I have done the stalk a job tackic and still I am empty handed. This is the point where many would expect me to say that I am sorry that I left Marsh but I am not. I know that there are jobs out there and I know that there is a way to get a job and I just haven't found that one that I am supposed to have.
Now on from the job front, last weekend was my grandmas side of the family reunion and it was a zoo at best. Those people drive me nuts and they all think that the things that I do are so awful that there is no way that I am ever going to be anything. Acutally what they are saying is that I won't be like them and they seem to think that is a bad thing. I know that I never want to be like them at all the only real thing that they have going for them is money and although money is nice there are so many more important things that must be delt with, maybe that is why not having a job isn't driving me crazy but it is starting to get to me. I just want to be able to pay my bills and make ends meet.
In other news at the reunion I got to hang out with my cousin because we ran away from all of the freaks that drive us crazy and talk and laugh a lot. It would be a safe bet that the people that she goes to school with think I am a nut job and wonder what kind of family she has but it was nice.
I still live my mom's mom because it aids in me keeping my sanity if I were to move back into my mom's house I am pretty sure that I would come 100% unglued because of the craziness that mom insists on putting herself in.
Well everyone if you still read this let me know what is up in your life and I will talk to you all soon.
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
A look Ahead
As I am looking for a new job I find myself board crazy. There is so much that has to be done that is just a bit overwhelming. I know that there is a a job out there and if I continue to show myself that I am worth more than six dollars an hour and I will not go back to Marsh. You read it here first folks. I am broke and getting close to being desperate but I am still not going back because I am not that desperate. I am also living with my grandma and grandpa bales right now because I won't move back in with my mom.
My truck is still great and will be until I can't make the payments and I run out of money but I will make it.
One of my best friends moved to Nebraska and I haven't gotten to talk to him in weeks. He did promise me coffee before he left yet I got none.
I am off to look for a job some more. Talk to you all soon. Remember you can always call me.
My truck is still great and will be until I can't make the payments and I run out of money but I will make it.
One of my best friends moved to Nebraska and I haven't gotten to talk to him in weeks. He did promise me coffee before he left yet I got none.
I am off to look for a job some more. Talk to you all soon. Remember you can always call me.
Monday, August 14, 2006
Changes over Time
There have been so many changes in my life in the last few weeks that there really isn't any one place to start. I am unemployed and I hate it but it is okay and I will survive a new job is out there I just have to find it and then manage to keep it long term. I know that it was my choice to quit my job at Marsh but it wasn't an easy choice for me to make yet still somehow I managed to do it.
I am done with school thank the Lord. I spent a week in Arizona with my cousin Lexi, my grandparents and many other family members that I don't get to spend much time with anyway. I know that it was fun because Lexi tells me everyday that she had fun. We went to the Grand Canyon for a day and she had a blast.
I am done with school thank the Lord. I spent a week in Arizona with my cousin Lexi, my grandparents and many other family members that I don't get to spend much time with anyway. I know that it was fun because Lexi tells me everyday that she had fun. We went to the Grand Canyon for a day and she had a blast.
Monday, July 24, 2006
Well, It Has Been Over A Month
Lets see here there has really been a lot going on so I will try to hit the highlights for those of you who still read this, I'm not sure you are out here but if you that is great.
1. I quit my job at Marsh, no I don't have a new one to go to but I will. I think I will temp for a while and then hopefully one of those jobs will become a more permanent one and I will be able to pay all my bills for the next couple of months.
2. I kept my truck because I have to have something to drive and then the sucker caught on fire, yes that was fire. I am okay and now that I have my truck back it is okay too but it scared me and I was ticked off I had only had it for 35 days when it happened.
3. Rob and I are no more, after nearly 2 years together I have made the choice to stop dating him. It was rough and I do still love him but in some ways I wonder if our relationship was holding me here so that I wouldn't take the time to see what else is out there. This was more painful than even the fire in the truck.
4. THE MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL...I finished grad school today. I have a masters degree in business oh my lord I can't believe it. I never knew that it would take me two and a half years but it is done and if I choose I don't have to go to school ever again.
I am sure there is more but I will get to that sooner or later, for now have a good day.
1. I quit my job at Marsh, no I don't have a new one to go to but I will. I think I will temp for a while and then hopefully one of those jobs will become a more permanent one and I will be able to pay all my bills for the next couple of months.
2. I kept my truck because I have to have something to drive and then the sucker caught on fire, yes that was fire. I am okay and now that I have my truck back it is okay too but it scared me and I was ticked off I had only had it for 35 days when it happened.
3. Rob and I are no more, after nearly 2 years together I have made the choice to stop dating him. It was rough and I do still love him but in some ways I wonder if our relationship was holding me here so that I wouldn't take the time to see what else is out there. This was more painful than even the fire in the truck.
4. THE MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL...I finished grad school today. I have a masters degree in business oh my lord I can't believe it. I never knew that it would take me two and a half years but it is done and if I choose I don't have to go to school ever again.
I am sure there is more but I will get to that sooner or later, for now have a good day.
Friday, June 16, 2006
This Week In Review
So this week was one of the most exciting on record in a while for me and not all in good ways. I will start by hitting the highlights then I will proceed onward to the lowlights which tend to be a bit more depressing, that is why after all they call them the low lights.
HIGHLIGHTS
I bought a new truck it is a 2003 Saturn Vue...
There are a lot more but I will wait
LOWLIGHTS
Lower pay...Few Hours....AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HIGHLIGHTS
I bought a new truck it is a 2003 Saturn Vue...
There are a lot more but I will wait
LOWLIGHTS
Lower pay...Few Hours....AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
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